Relationships are tricky for nearly everyone. It’s because we all come from such different backgrounds. And while growing up, we experience painful life lessons that we sometimes never learn from. Divorce, family conflicts and school problems can make it very difficult for us to have healthy relationships as adults.
Which brings us to your ex girlfriend leaving you. And it could be for any of those childhood issues we just mentioned. How do you try and heal from that relationship?
Well according to Psych Central, the web’s largest and oldest independent mental health social network, there are some guidelines you can follow:
•Communicate. Each couple has their own stamp…yelling, fighting, stonewalling. But with a quient period, and then express your feelings. Be strong enough to take responsibility and tell your ex what is is you want. Bottom line: she can’t read your mind even if you’ve been together for years. And don’t be judgmental about how she responds.
•Be empathetic. If you’ve been together for any period of time, she’s in pain too. Anger serves no purpose here.
•Listen attentively. Hear how she is really feeling without interrupting.
•Look for compromise. The goal is to resolve your differences so that both of you can come out ahead.
•Try and forgive. This does not excuse any kind of abusive behavior. But forgiveness means you don’t feel the need to retaliate. Anger can be incredibly harmful to both your mental and physical health.
Just remember that relationships like anything worthwhile in life require effort. Be patient and allow for mistakes. And if you need therapy to help you through this difficult period, do not hesitate to get it.